Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Mmmmm...Ice cream. Wait...WTF IS THIS?!?!!? OMG!!!11!!

Ice cream...oh Ice Cream...how I love thee.

Has there ever been a time in your life when the phrase "Let's get some ice cream" hasn't been just the happiest 4 words of your day?

Ice cream always brings back the memories of hearing the bells of the ice cream truck on a hot summer day. Sprinting home to mom to get some change to throw into the truck for a cone or (and even though I know this is not technically ice cream) a Firecracker Popsicle.

Leave it to the world (and pretty much I am pointing the old finger at you Japanese peeps) to fuck up yet another bit of childhood nostalgia. Maybe I should start with blaming Baskin-Robbins and their god damn 31 flavors. They are probably where this shit started. You really don't need more than Vanilla and Chocolate...maybe throw in Strawberry so you can have that Neapolitan crap. Once you start adding more flavors you just open the floodgates for the bullshit below.

I found a site earlier tonight that has a list of 101 Frightening Ice Cream Flavors From Around The World. The fact that there is even one flavor of ice cream that is “frightening” is pretty fucking sad. That is almost like having a list of 101 Children's Television Programs with Graphic Violence and Strong Sexual Content. There is no need to have any...ANY...flavor of ice cream that even comes close to those listed below (and these are just the first 20 on the list).

1. Fish Ice Cream.
2. Octopus Ice Cream.
3. Squid Ice Cream.
4. Ox Tongue Ice Cream.
5. Sweet Potato Ice Cream.
6. Fried Eggplant Ice Cream.
7. Crab Ice Cream.
8. Corn Ice Cream.
9. Koshihikari Rice Ice Cream.
10. Wasabi Ice Cream.
11. Shrimp Ice Cream.
12. Eel Ice Cream.
13. Nagoya Noodle Ice Cream.
14. Chicken Wing Ice Cream.
15. Miso Ice Cream.
16. Cactus Ice Cream.
17. Raw Horseflesh Ice Cream.  <-- Are you fucking kidding me?
18. Goat Ice Cream.
19. Whale Ice Cream.
20. Shark Fin Noodle Ice Cream.

There are 81...Eighty-FUCKING-One more of those ice creams on that list too.  But if you go to the link take special notice of how many of these are Japanese.  WTF is wrong with you people over in Japan?  Do you hate your tastebuds or what?

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